There are two songs with some similar lines. Both songs are beautiful and can be easily related to by anyone who has loved or lost, or both.
The songs I speak of are Mujhse Pehli Si Mohabbat Mere Mehboob Na Maang by Faiz Ahmed Faiz and Kabhi Kabhi Mere Dil Mein Khayal Aata Hai by Sahir Ludhianvi.
The first song has the line
“Tu jo mil jaaye toh taqdeer nigun ho jaaye
Yun na tha maine faqat chaha tha yun ho jaaye”
(Were I to have you, my destiny would not matter.
This was not the way it was, but only how I desired it to be)
The second, by Sahir Ludhianvi, ends with
Kabhi kabhi mere dil mein khayal aata hai
Ki jaise tu mujhe chahegi umr bhar yun hi
Uthegi meri taraf pyaar ki nazar yun hi
Main jaanta hoon ki tu ghair hai magar yun hi
(Once in a while, a fleeting thought settles upon my mind
That you will want me forever
And your eyes will always find me through the lenses of love
I know you are not mine, but nonetheless
Once in a while…)
I think both songs are brilliant and I am a fan both of both the poets, and relate to both songs equally. But as far as these two parts of these songs are concerned, I favour the second more than the first.
Let me tell you why.
One starts with a fantasy and then crashes it against the wall of reality. The other recognizes the constraints of reality but is belligerent enough to reiterate the fantasy that exists nonetheless, and almost enjoys it.
Playing, in children and in adults through imagination and fantasy, is an integral part of the experience of an unburdened sense of existing. A child who cannot play, adults who cannot dream or be spontaneous have lost parts of themselves that allow them to be free without being afraid.
The capacity to be surprised also shuts down when one has had to abandon fantasy and playing too soon to the demands of harsh reality. Being surprised means not knowing and not being in control, which creates a vulnerability that causes anxiety. The titles of both songs are significant if one thinks of them in light of the above. One says it can no longer be the way it used to once in a while, while the other wonders and allows itself to be carried with that wonder.
Sahir’s lyrics have two qualities of good psychotherapy (I refer to the psychoanalytic or depth psychological approaches). It has the capacity to surprise, for when I heard the song for the first time I was caught by surprise both at the point where he dips into the level of reality after giving a glimpse of what the mind has fantasized, as well as when he rises again from reality back to fantasy with the very last ‘I know…. But..”. A second quality it has is of giving something to keep the listener going, by not putting an end to his fantasy-ing and imagination. To go on being. What philosophers and others have called Eros.
Keeping the fantasy alive is important for one to feel “alive” in the true sense of being. Life is not about going towards something. It is about the here and now. The chase is more important than the capture. The capture brings about an end to the game. What do you do then?
The entire meaning of a wide range of emotions and their whole worth comes from your experience of them. Love, for instance. The maximum you can derive out of that emotion is to be in love, to feel it from the depths of your being. Not to feel it towards a certain object alone but rather to experience it within yourself. Being with the one you love is an advantage, but doesn’t, or shouldn’t change your experience of it in any way, because it became a complete emotion the moment you began to feel it.
The songs I speak of are Mujhse Pehli Si Mohabbat Mere Mehboob Na Maang by Faiz Ahmed Faiz and Kabhi Kabhi Mere Dil Mein Khayal Aata Hai by Sahir Ludhianvi.
The first song has the line
“Tu jo mil jaaye toh taqdeer nigun ho jaaye
Yun na tha maine faqat chaha tha yun ho jaaye”
(Were I to have you, my destiny would not matter.
This was not the way it was, but only how I desired it to be)
The second, by Sahir Ludhianvi, ends with
Kabhi kabhi mere dil mein khayal aata hai
Ki jaise tu mujhe chahegi umr bhar yun hi
Uthegi meri taraf pyaar ki nazar yun hi
Main jaanta hoon ki tu ghair hai magar yun hi
(Once in a while, a fleeting thought settles upon my mind
That you will want me forever
And your eyes will always find me through the lenses of love
I know you are not mine, but nonetheless
Once in a while…)
I think both songs are brilliant and I am a fan both of both the poets, and relate to both songs equally. But as far as these two parts of these songs are concerned, I favour the second more than the first.
Let me tell you why.
One starts with a fantasy and then crashes it against the wall of reality. The other recognizes the constraints of reality but is belligerent enough to reiterate the fantasy that exists nonetheless, and almost enjoys it.
Playing, in children and in adults through imagination and fantasy, is an integral part of the experience of an unburdened sense of existing. A child who cannot play, adults who cannot dream or be spontaneous have lost parts of themselves that allow them to be free without being afraid.
The capacity to be surprised also shuts down when one has had to abandon fantasy and playing too soon to the demands of harsh reality. Being surprised means not knowing and not being in control, which creates a vulnerability that causes anxiety. The titles of both songs are significant if one thinks of them in light of the above. One says it can no longer be the way it used to once in a while, while the other wonders and allows itself to be carried with that wonder.
Sahir’s lyrics have two qualities of good psychotherapy (I refer to the psychoanalytic or depth psychological approaches). It has the capacity to surprise, for when I heard the song for the first time I was caught by surprise both at the point where he dips into the level of reality after giving a glimpse of what the mind has fantasized, as well as when he rises again from reality back to fantasy with the very last ‘I know…. But..”. A second quality it has is of giving something to keep the listener going, by not putting an end to his fantasy-ing and imagination. To go on being. What philosophers and others have called Eros.
Keeping the fantasy alive is important for one to feel “alive” in the true sense of being. Life is not about going towards something. It is about the here and now. The chase is more important than the capture. The capture brings about an end to the game. What do you do then?
The entire meaning of a wide range of emotions and their whole worth comes from your experience of them. Love, for instance. The maximum you can derive out of that emotion is to be in love, to feel it from the depths of your being. Not to feel it towards a certain object alone but rather to experience it within yourself. Being with the one you love is an advantage, but doesn’t, or shouldn’t change your experience of it in any way, because it became a complete emotion the moment you began to feel it.
It need not “have” the other in order to attain a greater or more evolved state.
Love is an experience inside your own being that leads you to find things outside of you to give it an outlet or an organized form. You may like someone or admire them because of their qualities, but you love them only if you have opened yourself up to feeling love in general in the first place.
But the beautiful thing is, the moment you are able to do this you feel like you have reached the pinnacle of what is pleasurable and makes life worth living.
Poets in their wonderful double entendres and their prose have captured the essence of life and love like no one else has.
But the beautiful thing is, the moment you are able to do this you feel like you have reached the pinnacle of what is pleasurable and makes life worth living.
Poets in their wonderful double entendres and their prose have captured the essence of life and love like no one else has.
Ghalib, (insert “Sigh” here) once wrote
“Tere vaade par jiye hum
to yeh jaan jhoot jaana
ki khushi se mar na jaate
agar aitbaar hota ? "
(To say that I live because of your promise to me
“Tere vaade par jiye hum
to yeh jaan jhoot jaana
ki khushi se mar na jaate
agar aitbaar hota ? "
(To say that I live because of your promise to me
Would make this life of mine a lie.
For would I not have died of sheer joy
Had I trusted it to be sincere?)
Apart from the surface level meaning of the inability to trust the love of a beloved, I think what he is also trying to get at is the essence – the juissance- of life which is in the journey between wanting and having. We live in a valley of desire and longing, and to attain all that we want would be equivalent to ceasing to live.
Like delaying an orgasm indefinitely
So that the heightened arousal, which in itself is pleasing, doesn’t come to an immediate end.
Apart from the surface level meaning of the inability to trust the love of a beloved, I think what he is also trying to get at is the essence – the juissance- of life which is in the journey between wanting and having. We live in a valley of desire and longing, and to attain all that we want would be equivalent to ceasing to live.
Like delaying an orgasm indefinitely
So that the heightened arousal, which in itself is pleasing, doesn’t come to an immediate end.
